Key Takeaways (TLDR)
Topic: How to stop shouting into the marketing void and start showing up in a way that feels natural, energizing, and true to who you actually are.
What you’ll learn: Most marketing advice assumes everyone should be doing the same things in the same ways. But your best marketing isn’t the strategy that worked for someone else. It’s the one that fits how you’re genuinely wired. This post introduces four marketing expression types based on how you naturally showed up as a kid: the Quiet Magnet (deep, thoughtful, intimate), the Spark Plug (vibrant, expressive, energetic), the Connector Cable (collaborative, community-building, bridging), and the Disruptor (bold, courageous, norm-challenging). Each type comes with specific marketing platforms, formats, and approaches that align with their natural strengths, plus a reflection quiz to help you figure out which one you are.
Who this is for: Entrepreneurs, coaches, service providers, and small business owners who feel stuck, drained, or like they’re constantly performing a version of themselves that doesn’t quite fit, and are ready to find a more sustainable, authentic, and genuinely enjoyable approach to marketing.
Written by: Emily Aborn, Small Business Copywriter and Podcast Host of the Small Business Casual Podcast, based in NH.
Ever feel like you’re just shouting into the void?
Do you feel stuck with your marketing? Trapped in comparison? Drowned out by the noisy online space?
What if the answer isn’t another opinion, strategy, opt-in, course, or coach?
What if you don’t need to be more, be less, or dance to the beat of a different drum?
What if your marketing could be WAY MORE FUN and feel more comfortable for YOU!?
I believe it can, and my goal in this article and episode is to show you how!
This will help you turn down some of the outer noise, remove the allure of chasing after the perfect solution, and help you get out there and start doing the work AS YOU.
You’ll get clear on how you BEST show up and express yourself online, in your marketing materials, in your communities and networks, and beyond, so you can do more of what feels good and is true to you.
In the episode:
- Why marketing can feel like a nightmare
- You’re not too much, and you don’t need to be more
- A reflection question that will shine light on YOUR best marketing techniques
- Marketing playgrounds for Disruptors, Spark Plugs, Connector Cables, and Quiet Magnets
- A FREE mini-quiz Click HERE to download!
I had a moment recently when an innocent scroll, spotting someone’s brand colors, and perfectly curated feed spawned a full-on, existential business crisis for me.
Wow, what font are they using?
I bet THEY’RE getting more business than me!
What have they got that I don’t!?
Maybe I’m just a little bit TOO much…
Maybe I’m not enough?!
I started questioning everything. My message, my voice, my content, my website, but more detrimentally, MYSELF.
Have you been there?
We might like to think it’s about the branding, or the content, or consistency… but deep down, it brings feelings of not enoughness or too muchness.
Am I just another voice echoing into the void?
Is there something WRONG inside me that others are getting all the likes, nods of approval, success, accolades?
Ok, let’s stop the spiraling and take a breath.
Whew.
Starting to feel a little better already, aren’t you?
There’s a lot of noise out there.
We’re constantly bombarded with the noise, both internal and external, on how we “should” be going about this whole marketing and showing up thing.
We’re just over here trying to do the right things, research the right strategies, get the right feedback.
Meanwhile, we’re consuming more than we’re implementing. Consuming, watching, comparing, and admiring from afar feels safe. Concrete. Solvable. You can hide behind all that, figuring out the next step, instead of courageously just being YOU.
The purpose of this blog, episode, and quiz are to encourage you that you don’t have to scream louder, sparkle more, or at all if you don’t want to. You don’t need to become some sort of very talented chameleon in order to be seen and heard.
Ignore the external. Come back to who you are inside.
Not the perfectly curated social media version of you.
Not the “this will perform if I do it just so” version of you
The version of you that’s real, original, and from that place expresses yourself with confidence.
I believe when we enjoy doing something, whether it be a health habit or a marketing habit, we’re more likely to be consistent with it and keep showing up. And I think we when step into our marketing comfort zone, it can even be FUN.
Inside our comfort zones, we can find an uncomplicated flow in our marketing and step out with more authenticity.
Reflection and Mini-Quiz Time!
Think back to how you liked to express yourself as a kid…
Which of these sounds the most like you?
(Don’t overthink this and don’t hold me to every last word or try to fit a description, just go with with one feels the most accurate):
A. I liked to observe, imagine, and create quietly. Sometimes I was off in my own world, writing stories or talking to one or two close friends.
B. I was the life of the party and always entertaining: creating skits, singing, dancing, performing, and could almost always be found off on a new adventure.
C. I loved organizing or inventing games with and for friends, introducing people, or helping others feel included.
D. I pushed boundaries. A rebel with or without a cause, I challenged rules, asked “why?” a lot, and wasn’t afraid to stir the pot.
What did you come up with?
A, B, C, or D?
As we go through these four expression types, you’ll see how we actually CAN let more of our inner world be a guide in how we show up.
Quick caveats: You’re probably a mix of several of these. You’re a multi-faceted human, not a robot or tidy algorithm, and we exist on a spectrum of all the things. Look for ways that you can be empowered in who you are and feel good in your marketing as you choose the right avenues and places that light you up and give you energy. Take what you want, bless and release the rest.
A) The Quiet Magnet
Do you cringe when someone wants to talk about the weather? Bite your nails just thinking about making small talk? If this is you, chances are you like to go DEEP. You’re grounded and real. It may take you time to build trust with others. It may take time to put yourself out there and draw others into your world. You might need to warm up a bit (shake out them sillies) before feeling comfortable enough to share your insights and perspectives.
You don’t need the spotlight. Thoughtful conversations, writing, and soulful connections are how you make your imprint.
Your strength lies in depth, not decibels.
If this is you, lean into this!! The world needs more of your quietly magnetic energy.
- Give yourself grace with your marketing. It may take you more time than others to find your groove.
- Favor cozier groups, 1:1 conversations, and coffee chats, or intimate settings as your primary spots for building relationships.
- Bring in a conversational voice (even on social media) and bring people into your depth and knowledge while still keeping it relatable and relevant to where you’re sharing and to whom. Use their language and meet them in the middle.
- Share your perspectives, insights, and wisdom! They’re your gift.
- Don’t focus on doing more or being in all the places; focus on getting better and going deeper with what you choose. Conversely, avoid putting all your eggs in one basket and try new things from time to time.
B) The Spark Plug
Vibrant, expressive, you like to be in motion as often as possible. You likely tip higher towards being an extrovert and don’t shy away from group settings. You may even like being the one in charge, up front, and taking control of the electrically buzzing room. You’re magnetic, joyful, positive, and don’t mind a little spontaneity.
Here are some reminders for you, dear Spark Plug:
- It’s a gift in and of itself to bring energy and enthusiasm to any room and conversation. Own it.
- Lean into networking and meeting people in person whenever you can, show your face, and that electric sparkle! This might look like larger groups, speaking engagements, video, workshops, networking, etc.
- A lot of your marketing should be expressive and outward-focused. Don’t forget to speak to people like individuals (example: it’s better to speak to everyone in a crowd as a “YOU” vs. a you all).
- Build on that outgoing, vivacious, energetic warmth you have, and let it open up the doors to new adventures and opportunities – follow your energy!
- Lastly, when you find something that works, stick with it consistently. Don’t be afraid to seize the day with spontaneity and new opportunities, of course. Just be careful not to overload your plate with SO many things that you lose consistency and momentum in any one area. It’s about balance.
C) Connector Cable
You’re the ultimate collaborator and community bridge-builder! You spot patterns, link ideas, and help others connect dots. You tend to be very loyal once you find people and causes you can stand behind, and you don’t easily jump from one thing to the next, because building the right, strong relationships matters to you. You know this is a long game, and you’re in it alongside others for the long game as well. You love to be the one guiding conversations, facilitating breakthroughs, inspiring ahas, and making people feel included and like it was done just for them. Your power is in seeing others, offering your perspective, ideas, and insights as you weave things together for them.
- Don’t underestimate the power of connecting people as a way of leaving your imprint. You can change lives through one single introduction, and your life can be changed through a single introduction too.
- Do emphasize and highlight your ability to collaborate and connect people and ideas, and bring them together and things to life. It’s a marketable skill, a major value add, and credibility builder. And oh, look… here you are just doing it naturally!
- Seek out collaborators who align with your values, fill strengths you don’t have, and who you can trust to build together.
- Share and shine the spotlights on others, but don’t forget yourself, too! You’re running a business and also need to turn the spotlight on YOU.
- While you tend to see solutions, naturally, emerge through the patterns. Remember that not everyone wants a solution. You can still be a guide to help someone find their own inner wisdom rather than just flat out telling them what to do. Your ability to see both sides is an incredible resource for teaching, helping, guiding, and creating.
D) Disruptor
Courage, clarity, conviction. Those are three words that sum up the powerful disruptors. You challenge norms, ask bold questions, and aren’t afraid to say the thing no one else will. Whether you’re starting movements or shaking things up online, you are momentum in human form.
- Unapologetic and shaking up the norm, you exude confidence when selling your products or services. Use that to your advantage in your marketing.
- You likely have a natural magnetism and lure as people are drawn to your bold, courageous edge.
- You can use platforms to make some noise, show what you do differently, or how you think outside the box.
- Don’t sit around waiting for others to make the moves… proactively reach out, invite, create, pitch, offer, make the ask, create the thing you think should exist!
- Remember that not everyone is as courageous, bold, and unafraid as you. Meet them where they are in your marketing and messaging. Don’t dismiss their pain just because you’re feeling all hot and proud!
Comfort Zones for All Four Types
What if your marketing could be more like sliding down the slide at a playground? Find your marketing comfort zones and start having WAY more fun!
A) Quiet Magnet Marketing Playgrounds:
- Long-form writing (blogs, newsletters, captions, Substack, etc.)
- Intimate workshops or small group circles
- 1:1 Coffee chats
- Podcast guesting (especially interview-style or reflective formats)
- Personalized and individual emails (let’s play Pen Pal!)
- Quieter social platforms or posting quotes and insights
- Collaborations with like-hearted people
B) Spark Plug Marketing Playgrounds:
- Instagram Stories, Reels, TikTok, YouTube
- Public speaking or live workshops
- Hosting a podcast or video series, as well as guesting
- Challenges, events, and summits
- Engaging in in-person networking or pop-ups
- Personal brand photography, behind-the-scenes, day-in-the-life
- Hosting mini experiences or energizing giveaways
C) Connector Cable Marketing Playgrounds:
- Collaborations or affiliate marketing
- Strategic partnerships or co-led workshops
- Referral programs or word-of-mouth initiatives
- Masterminds or small, curated group spaces
- Community-building (Facebook groups, Voxer chats, Mighty Networks)
- Teaching-style content (how-tos, resources, tools, frameworks)
- Being a guest expert for others’ programs
- Thoughtful comment threads, forums, or shared documents
D) Disruptor Marketing Playgrounds:
- Bold social posts that challenge norms and create conversation
- Leading a movement or campaign/event that hasn’t been done before
- Lives or in-the-moment video
- Hot takes, rants, unpopular opinions (audio/video) – don’t forget to say how you’re different, though!
- Sales pages, offers, and copy that stir emotion
- Pitching yourself to podcasts, media, and stages
- Hosting your own “anti-webinar” or spicy opt-in
- Guerilla marketing tactics or surprise activation
- Personality-based marketing
How to Lean Into Your Unique Style
- Get to know yourself as deeply as you can
- Don’t just assume you like or dislike something or are a certain way
- Listen and pay attention to when you’re energized and drained
- Try new things, take actual notes about the experience, observe – post mortem what went well and what didn’t
- Bring in all hands on deck: Heart, body, and mind, all listening and paying attention
Entrepreneurship is the best self-development there is, and this is one of the areas that,t once you learn about yourself, and really allow who you are to come through, it starts to become much easier (dare I say fun!?) from there.
You don’t have to impress to express. You don’t have to be the loudest, coolest, newest. You just have to be the truest. The YOU-est.
Before taking on something in your marketing, sharing something, or trying something new in your business, ask yourself:
- Is it YOU?
- Is it kind and TRUE?
- Does it feel doable and repeatable?
- Does it invite connection?
Flashy burns out. Shiny gets dull. Loudness fades. Don’t try to be shinier or copy someone else. Focus on being real.
Real sticks. Lasts. Lingers. It’s sustainable. It builds and grows deep roots in your community, with your clients and collaborators.
FAQ: Marketing Comfort Zones
Why does marketing feel so exhausting for some business owners?
+ Often it’s because they’re doing it in a way that doesn’t match their natural wiring. If you’re a deep, reflective thinker being told to post Reels every day, or a bold disruptor being told to stick to quiet newsletter content, the mismatch creates friction that drains your energy and makes consistency feel impossible. Marketing starts to feel more like performing than expressing. The solution is finding the formats and platforms that work with how you actually like to show up, so the work feels more natural and sustainable over time.
What are the four marketing expression types?
+ The Quiet Magnet thrives in depth over volume: long-form writing, intimate conversations, podcast guesting, and thoughtful one-on-one connection.
+ The Spark Plug lights up in expressive, high-energy formats: video, speaking, live events, Instagram Stories, and in-person networking.
+ The Connector Cable builds community and bridges relationships: collaborations, referral programs, masterminds, teaching-style content, and facilitated group spaces.
+ The Disruptor makes noise and challenges norms: bold social posts, unpopular opinions, pitching themselves to stages and podcasts, and marketing that stirs emotion and conversation.
Most people are a mix, but tend to lean most naturally toward one.
Do I have to be on every marketing platform to be successful?
+ Uhhhh… resounding no. Trying to be everywhere usually leads to a mediocre presence everywhere. Your energy is better spent going deeper on the platforms and formats that align with your expression type than spreading yourself thin across every channel that marketing gurus say you should be on. A Quiet Magnet doing one beautifully written newsletter a week will almost always outperform a Quiet Magnet reluctantly churning out daily Reels. Find where your type naturally thrives and commit to showing up there consistently and well.
How do I figure out which marketing expression type I am?
Start by thinking back to how you liked to express yourself as a kid, before anyone told you how you should be doing it.
+ Did you prefer quiet, imaginative solo play or one-on-one conversations?
+ Were you the performer and entertainer, always in motion
+ Did you love organizing games, introducing friends, and making people feel included?
+ Or were you the one pushing boundaries, asking why, and refusing to follow rules just because they existed?
That childhood instinct is still in you, and it’s one of the most honest clues to how you naturally show up and connect with others.
What if I’m a mix of several marketing types?
+ Good news! That’s the norm, not the exception. You’re a multifaceted human, not a tidy algorithm. The goal isn’t to lock yourself into one box but to identify which type feels most energizing and most like you, and lean into those marketing approaches first. From there, you can layer in elements from your secondary types as it feels natural. The questions to ask before taking on anything new in your marketing are:
- Is this me?
- Is it true?
- Does it feel doable and repeatable?
- Does it invite connection?
If the answer is yes, it’s probably worth trying!
